Warmth wrapped itself around her chest and waist. A soft, fluttering murmur hummed in her throat. The stiffness that had become the norm, holding her hunched shoulders high, fizzled away. A light prickle grazed the back of her neck. Letting out a soft breath, she relaxed into the sensation behind her. A warm gentle breath brushed a comforting tickle her ear. Her eyes remained closed, as she released the pressure in her shoulder blades. Another quiet murmur escaped her. A chuckle tickled the back of her neck. “I’m here,” whispered a safe, deep, comforting voice. His arms, around her chest and waist, gave a gentle squeeze. “I’m here. I’m not going anywhere.” A small whimper escaped her, as she wrapped her arms around his and squeezed them tight.
24 April 2026
Saundersfoot, Stratford-upon-Avon & Wall-E
Well, my day at work, today, has been pretty
pointless. Virgin Media is down, so there is no internet, no server and no
phonelines. My manager is very poorly, so he has taken the day off as holiday
and gone home. I have counted stock unnecessarily just for something to do, I
have emptied the bins, deep cleaned the kitchen, cleaned my desk and I have
read a printed-out copy of the company’s quality manual, which is one of my
tasks to do anyway, so I was kind of productive. The day has gone by incredibly
slowly though, and I have a twitch over my left eye. Stressing about not being
able to work and all of the work that I will have to do on Monday, to play
catch up, definitely isn’t helping.
What I did want to write about
though, is that over the Easter bank Holiday weekend, I went on what is
potentially my last holiday. Side note, potentially is my brain’s new go-to
word, so I am very sorry for not realizing how many time I will overuse it. I
didn’t exactly enjoy my holiday, because I spent the whole time feeling very
upset from an avoidant situationship, which I am now out of and am already
feeling like a normal person again.
Anyways, where was I? Okay, so
I treated myself and went to Tenby and Saundersfoot on Good Friday and I didn’t
come back until late on Easter Monday. I have never been away for three nights
to Saundersfoot before. I have only ever done two. The only time I have ever
been away anywhere for longer than two nights was back in June 2016, and I went
to Talybont with my ex-partner.
The weather wasn’t the best.
This was during the Storm Dave. I had 35-50mph constant wind, but I did still
manage to walk 20 miles on the Saturday and 22 miles on the Sunday. It didn’t
rain the entire time either. I managed to get a few dry patches. I collected
pebbles from Saundersfoot, Wiseman’s Bridge and Amroth, and I painted my
colleagues little beach-themed pictures, as a little holiday present. I really
enjoyed that. My mum bought me a new pack of Posca pens specifically for this,
which I am very grateful for, as my old ones have mostly dried up now.
I unintentionally found a cute,
fruit themed toy. I really hate the look of the popular Labubu fluffy bag
charms. They look ugly and scary. I found a little gift shop that sold blind
boxes of really cute fruit-themed similar style bag charm toys. There were four
to collect, a grapefruit themed character, a kiwi one, a lemon one and an
avocado one. I bought four and got two lemon themed characters and two avocado
themed characters. They are so incredibly cute. I love them so much. I am going
to keep one for best and then I can use the duplicate to actually hang from my
bag.
Last Sunday, a colleague to me
to my favourite place, Stratford-upon-Avon for the day. He was looking after
me, because I had been crying constantly for the past three days. I was his
personal tour guide. I showed him where Shakespeare’s birthplace was, we
visited the riverside markets, we passed the Shakespeare gardens, where William
Shakespeare’s house was, we visited The Guild Chapel and learnt a lot about its
links to the Masons and its Doomsday references. Then we went to Trinity
church, but sadly, it was closed, so we couldn’t pay our respects to William
Shakespeare. We did sit by the riverside and enjoyed a cup of tea, whilst
watching couples row boats up and down the waterway. Then we went over to Cox’s
Yard and took a flyer for the plays at The Attic this year. We had a really
nice day and the time flew by.
This weekend, we are going to
the Think Tank in Birmingham to watch Wall-E on the 3D cinema. I’m really
looking forward to it. We are, also, going to look around the museum at all of
the old engineering. They are supposed to have an old steam train section and
some old planes too. It is nice to have a friend who has the time of day for
me. I am really looking forward to tomorrow now. And, today is the first day
where I haven’t got upset, yet.
The internet came back on at 10:30am. I have rushed to try and catch up
on most of my work. I don’t think I have a lot left to do right now. I have
labels to print, but I can’t do that right now, because James and Amy are in
the downstairs production room, which is annoying. I am in such a good mood
today, despite my twitching eye. I have no idea why. It is almost as if the
universe is telling me that today is going to be a good day or a lucky day, is
what it feels like
Oh, I did my tarot cards this
morning too. I am trying to pull three every morning, before work, and today I
got the Nine of Cups, the Eight of Pentacles and the Ace of Pentacles. Having
the wish fulfilment card is nice. I think it kind of just means that I am doing
well and I am taking small steps to look after myself again.
Note to self: Remember to
periodically look for Jellycat’s May Macaron, as I really like her, but she
sold out on the Jellycat website.
- Josie -
21 April 2026
Dream 21/04/2026
A blur of black came into focus. She squinted her eyes, as the world around her drifted away into a gentle hum. The image before her sharpened, as it formed into a significant shape. A pair of mesh charcoal-coloured trainers came into focus. Dried dirt scuffed at the toe and edges of the fabric. The laces were loosely tied, with the loop and aglet tucked deep beneath the shoe’s tongue, as though they had been pulled on and off many times, without undoing the laces. Her expression stiffened, as she narrowed her brows. A breathy hum escaped her, as she concentrated hard. The thumping in her chest beat slow, but loud. Pulse pounded in her ears. Poking out from the trainers were a pair of faded black socks, with a splodge of a vibrant, parrot green, almost hidden by the legs of ebony-coloured jeans. She heard her name. A flutter tingled in her chest. Her lips parted. ‘That voice,’ she thought, as the warmth inside of her spread.
“Sorry,” spoke the deep, familiar, male voice. She gasped. Her stomach swirled around in a circumbendibus. Colour rushed to her cheeks. ‘It’s him. It’s really him,’ she cried to herself, as her vision blurred. ‘He’s really here. He’s sorry. He means it.’ She sniffed, as a salty sting prickled the inner corners of her eyes.
“Josette!” called a female voice, in the distance. “Josette!” Gasping, the red-head threw her vision over her right shoulder. A lady with a bob of silver hair hobbled towards her, with a wrinkled brow. “Josette!” she cried. “I’ve lost my car. I don’t know what to do.” The lady trembled before her. The red-head threw her arms around the older lady and held her close.
“It’s okay, Tracey,” she spoke in a soft tone. “I’ll help you find it. We’ll look together.”
“Oh thank you,” cried the older lady, as she gripped onto the red-head’s elbow. “I just didn’t know what t’ do. It was there. I know it was. I parked right outside of work. I always do. My old man’s gonna kill me, I’ve lost our car.” A trembling wailed cry left the older lady’s mouth, as the creases on her forehead deepened. Her bottom lip quaked, as her eyes quivered.
Josette gave Tracey’s arm a gentle squeeze. “It’s okay,” the red-head reassured her, in a soft, soothing voice. “You’re not alone. We’ll find your car together. It’s okay.” With a gentle tug, the red-head led the older lady back in the direction of their workplace. Stroking her colleagues arm all the while, a knot formed in the red-head’s stomach, as she thought back to that familiar male voice and the pair of trainers. ‘Was it real?’ she wondered. ‘Was he real? Was any of it real?’
- Josie -