I keep trying to be positive and hoping and wishing, but nothing positive ever seems to happen to me. I should have known before I tried that I’m too old and grey to fly away. The only thing I have ever wanted, secretly ever wanted, is to be happy with someone. It hurts me how everyone else has a partner and all they do is complain. I never take being with someone for granted. Nothing is ever expected. I’m just never lucky enough to find someone who wants to communicate with me. They can communicate with everyone else in the world, even strangers online, but they can’t spare five minutes of their time for me. They always can for future partners though. It must be me. I’m not good enough. I can’t have the only thing I have ever wanted. I don’t want my next birthday to come.  I won’t let it. I have deleted all of my other online profiles. This is the last one that exists, so this is the place where I will say my goodbyes. That is the upside to living alone, no one will know that I am gone, until it is too late. I’m sorry that I’m not good enough for you reading this, or for anyone. There is nothing left for me. There is no one left for me. Forever is an awfully long time. Goodbye means going away and going away means forgetting. Goodbye.