#TBT – Crop Circles

(Josie Sayz: I just came across an absolutely awful flash fiction piece that I wrote over ten years ago that got published in a local Junior-Tales book. I have no idea how it managed to get published – there must not have been many entries… either that or everyone else’s work was worse than mine. I honestly believe that this is the worst thing that I have ever written in my entire life… yet it got published. Anyway, it seemed a little Throw-Back-Thursday-esque, so I thought I’d share it… despite how awful it is. The flash fiction piece can be found here: JosieSayz, (2005). Crop Circles. In: Young Writers, (2005). T.A.L.E.S Totally Amazing Little Exciting Stories, p66.)

(Josie Sayz: Edit: I should point out that the theme was explaining cases of the supernatural, with a word limit. I actually feel rather foolish, putting it up here, but I was a little kid, so don’t judge me!)

Crop Circles

Ghostly, grim, ghastly gusts of terrifying winds surprisingly sprung upon the park’s grass field, on the night of the full moon. A high-pitched squeaking could be heard from the far distance. A massive, gigantic thing was hovering above the ground. A UFO! A real life UFO was loitering… landing. Suddenly a tremendous rocket-ike sound boomed from the air. Stenches of stinky, smelly smoke polluted the fresh park air. The spacecraft has taken off. No one would know that it was there… or would they?
          A crop circle! There left on the ground was a crop circle. No one knew where it had come from. Of course it was made by a UFO (an unidentified flying object, a flying saucer). It had to be a flying saucer. The crop circle roughly measured 250 feet long. A huge circle, surrounded by miniature circles and stars was swirled into the grass. Whoever knew that the aliens could make such interesting shapes and with such a magnificent flying saucer?
          Who could ever have imagined that there really are little green guys with extended index fingers that live among us, but up there in our solar system? Well now, it is proven that there are aliens. Crop circles indicate that an alien spacecraft has recently landed. The spaceship leave an imprint of what the alien spacecraft looked like underneath. There are hundreds of things for us yet to find out about the formations of crop circles created by our alien friends, but this is just the beginning.

- Josie -

Ignorance and Arrogance

(Josie Sayz: I really wanted to write a story out of this little speech that popped into my head, but I didn’t want to spoil the humour in it, so for now, I shall leave it as it is, until I feel comfortable with the possible descriptions, actions and further content.)

Ignorance and Arrogance

Two friends, Caitlin and Emily, are at Emily’s house after school. Emily is showing Caitlin her art project that she made from polystyrene balls.
Location: Emily’s living room.
Time: Late afternoon, around 4pm.

Caitlin: How much were your polystyrene balls an’ where’d you get them from?
Emily: They’re a pound each from ‘Craft Stores Я Us’, why?
Caitlin: I need some for a space project. I need eight t’ make the solar system – actually better make that nine, I need one for the sun too.
Emily: Nine? Don’t you mean ten?
Caitlin: Ten, what would I need ten for? (Counts on her fingers) The sun, Mercury, Venus, Earth, Mars, Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus and Neptune. Nine. (Caitlin holds her hands up to Emily).
Emily: What about Pluto?
Caitlin: (Laughs) Pluto isn’t a planet.
Emily: What? Of course it is.
Caitlin: No it’s not. Pluto hasn’t been classified as a planet in nearly ten years.
Emily: Well I don’t believe it.
Caitlin: What, you don’t believe ‘NASA’?
Emily: No. Pluto is a planet.
Caitlin: Yeah an’ I bet you’d still believe the Earth was flat if they discovered it was round just yesterday and I bet you’d still think that the sun rotated around the Earth, instead of the other way round, if ‘NASA’ discovered that last month too. You’re just one of those annoying people that won’t accept that the facts have changed.
Emily: Am not.
Caitlin: I bet you still believe in adverbs too.
Emily: But adverbs are real.
Caitlin: Yeah, real stupid.
Emily: No they’re not; you use ‘em in writing all the time.
Caitlin: Yeah, if you want to sound like a ten year old. (Laughs) They’re just something that people make you believe in when you’re a little kid, like the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy and erm… er…
Emily: Santa?
Caitlin: (Serious) No, Santa Clause is real.

- Josie -

We’re Still a Love Song

(Josie Sayz: These are some lyrics for a song I wrote, for a competition. Needless to say, it didn’t win, otherwise someone would have heard of its existence, but I still like it all the same. It randomly popped into my head the other day (after not touching it in over five years) so I decided to dig it out and post it. Let me know what you think. Update: The girl’s part was originally in pink, but you couldn’t read it very well on the blue background, so it’s been changed to black – I hope that helps.)
(Black: girl’s part. Blue: guy’s part. Purple: both.)

Once upon a time,
I dreamt of you and I.
Wishing we could be;
I wonder if you see.
The tears and thoughts were faded,
The looks from you so jaded (yeah),
But as my thoughts go by
I’m left wondering why--
We’re still a love song,
It’s been so long
Without you by my side.
Because you left me,
Said you hate me.
What is there left to say?
Why are you treating me this way?
I sit here and think of you;
I wonder if you miss me too.
I apologise for what I said.
Can’t you be with me instead?
Whispered thoughts up in my ear,
Wish it wasn’t quite as clear.
Your picture’s in my mind,
As I’m left wondering why--
We’re still a love song,
It’s been so long
Without you by my side.
I wish that I had seen,
How much you mean to me.
There’s so much I wanna say,
Why are you treating me this way?
I look into the past
And wish that I could go back–
In time.
To that place…
To that place…
To that place,
Where you could read my mind…
We’re still a love song,
It’s been so long
I want you by my side.
I wish that you had seen
How much to me you mean.
What is there left to say?
We’re still a love song,
It’s been so long
I need you by my side.
Why did you leave me?
Didn’t you need me?
Is there nothing left to say?
Why are you treating me this way?

- Josie -

Bad-Boy-Frank

(Josie Sayz: This is a poem that I wrote for a ‘Humour Writing’ module. Storm Frank reminded me of its existence, so I thought that I would share it.)

When Frank arrived at school today
His bad image was gone.
A new kid came and took his crown
And Bad-Boy-Frank was gone.

A new task came, he stood his ground,
The fight was surely on,
To win back his reputation
Or he could not go on.

“I will remain victorious,”
Decided Bad-Boy-Frank.
“Destroying the school property
Will be my next big prank!”

He went to the caretaker’s room
To find what he did seek.
A spray-can used for graffiti
Would make the teachers shriek.

The can he shook, the image sprayed,
Written across the wall.
The corridor and paint were the
Same colour after all.

“Oh, Frank you are a star pupil,”
His Head Teacher did say.
“For repainting the corridor,
Now we don’t have to pay.”

Another plan for he did need,
His future was at stake.
He needed to make sure they did not
Think that he was fake.

Because of what the Head had said
The school thought he was good,
But this is not what he had meant,
His act misunderstood.

“I will remain victorious,”
Decided Bad-Boy-Frank.
“I will avenge my Head Teacher,
Because he is a crank!”

By greasing every locker door
Gripping would be at bay.
No one could ever open them,
Their hands would slip away.

But when Frank greased every handle,
His plan fell out of line.
The lockers were not slippery,
He only made them shine.

“Oh, Frank you are a star pupil,”
His Head Teacher did say.
“You’ve made the lockers shine so bright,
Instead of their dull grey.”

The new kid’s bad rule was over,
Revenge was now in sight.
Frank needed to kick the new kid
Out of his bad limelight.

Frank had given up on losing,
He’d really had enough.
He wished there was another way
To prove that he was tough.

“I will remain victorious,”
Decided Bad-Boy-Frank.
“If I could start a lunch food fight
It would smell really rank!”

Frank gained everyone’s attention
And then a can he threw,
Landing in the recycling,
His big, bad plan he blew.

“Hey guys, all look what Frank just did,”
Another kid did say.
“Frank has made the recycling fun!”
And threw his can away.

“Oh, Frank you are a star pupil,”
His Head Teacher did say.
“You made the students recycle.
You’ve really saved the day.”

- Josie -

It's Christmas Time

(Josie Sayz: I came up with the concept for this song years ago, but only got around to actually finishing it last year. I was listening to a lot of ‘Aerosmith’ and imagined Steve Tyler’s voice in my head as I wrote it.)

It’s Christmas Time
It’s Christmas time.
Hang up the cheer,
Spread all the stockings,
Light up the way.
And I know…
There’s so many things that I should have said,
But just not goodbye,
‘Cause it’s Christmas time.
It’s Christmas time.
I ain’t got no cheer,
No need for stockings,
Or lighting the way.
Now you’re gone.
I’d take back everything that I said,
Just for one more time.
Let me do things right.
I will bring out all the presents,
Heck, I’ll even wish for snow.
And we’ll deck the halls together,
Sneak a kiss under the mistletoe.
And when it’s cold I’ll hold ya tight,
Underneath the stars, so bright.
And then I’ll tell you that you’re mine,
Because, baby, it’s Christmas time.
It’s Christmas time.
We’re spreading cheer,
Hanging up stockings
And lighting the way.
Santa’s comin’,
He knows you’re mine,
We’re singing:
It’s Christmas time.

- Josie -