My Year In Review 2025

This year has been a rollercoaster of emotions. There have been lots of good times and bad times, but I think I have finally got to a place, where I am ready to leave 2025 behind and start 2026.

 

Right, let’s see, the beginning of 2025 was a little frustrating. I should have received the keys, to my maisonette, back in October 2024, then just in time for Christmas, but it got delayed again, until I finally got the keys on 31^st January. Despite my solicitor saying that I had to inspect the property before completion, as it was a repossession and I had to make sure that the previous owner had removed all of her belongings and left the maisonette in a good state, the estate agents refused to let me have a second look around. The only time that I was allowed to view it was before I put the offer in.
          Receiving the keys should have bene a good thing, but things just kept getting worse. To start with, there was a hole in the front door. Then, the previous owner had left a smashed up washing machine, a fridge that had been turned off since the previous May, with gone off food and alcohol in it (the alcohol appeared to have exploded and there was sticky sap everywhere). She had covered the kitchen in beer and oil, so it was unusable (I was told if I used the oven that it might go bang, and it would be impossible to clean all of the oil off everything). There was no access to gas or electricity. On my first walk around the maisonette, now that I owned it, the neighbours, who live opposite, called the police on me. Two community officers arrived at the property, watched me from outside, then I had to show them that I had the keys and explain to them that I owed the property. I was scared that I was going to be arrested for owning my own home.
          The issues with the gas and electricity were ongoing, throughout the year. As the winter was cold, and with no means to heat the maisonette, I ended up with two burst water pipes in the loft, which I had to pay a lot to get repaired. Even if I had access to gas and electricity, the boiler was illegally fitted, which I only found out after getting the keys, because the estate agent refused to let me get the gas and electricity tested.
         I spent most of my weekends doing little bits and pieces on my maisonette, to try and make it liveable. My mum wouldn’t let me spend long there, so the first solid amount of time that I spent on it was the Easter bank holiday weekend. That was when it first dawned on me that it was mine. I had a lot of holes and cracks to caulk, sand and prime. Then there was the horrific diarrhoea-coloured carpet, in the bedroom, which had never been vacuumed. It was full of hair, smashed up pills, contact lenses, the transparent, plastic tags from clothing. No matter what I tried to do, I just couldn’t get it clean, so I ripped it up. My mum paid for me to have grey laminate flooring fitted, as my new home and birthday present, combined. This really helped make the maisonette feel more like mine.
          I was very excited to decorate. I have painted the walls in every room. Prior to purchasing my maisonette, I have always lived in rented accommodation, so I have never been able to paint walls or decorate anywhere, to make it feel like me. This has been a year-long process, but I am finally getting there. I still need someone to wallpaper the feature wall, in the living room, but for now, I have painted the wall the colour that the wallpaper is, so that it feels more like my home.
          The gas and electricity didn’t get sorted until part way through September, which made doing certain renovations works impossible before this date. The number of times I had to book a day off work, for British Gas to come out to the property, and then the engineer just shrugged, said that he couldn’t do anything and then left hit double figures. Where I work, we only get 13 days holiday (we get 28 days, but then you take off the eight Bank Holidays/Public Holidays and the week we are closed over Christmas and I am left with 13 days holiday to last me the entire year) and ten of those days were used for British Gas appointments. All of which made me cry. September was, also, when I moved into my maisonette. I had to live for a few days without electricity or gas, and a few more weeks before I could get Wi-Fi, but I did it.
          I had my kitchen fitted at the beginning of December. It made me so incredibly happy. Again, getting the kitchen fitted has been a disaster. I struggled to get anyone to fit my kitchen (it is only a flat-pack Wickes kitchen, it is nothing fancy). My kitchen is very small, and many kitchen fitters said that it wasn’t worth their time. The one guy that I did manage to get to fit it was a liar and, it turns out, doesn’t actually know what he is doing. He said that he was at my maisonette from 8am until 7pm on seven occasions. Bear in mind, I had been told that the entire kitchen could be fitted in two days, by multiple people, including him. Over six weeks, this guy had barely done any work, and he ran off with my keys, to Wales. It took forever to get them back. The HR lady, where I work, was incredibly kind, and asked her husband and brother-in-law to fit my kitchen. They aren’t kitchen fitters, by trade, they just do it as a hobby, but they did an absolutely wonderful job. They had to fix a lot of mess that the previous guy did wrong, but I am so incredibly grateful to them. I actually have a kitchen, and it was in time for Christmas. This was the last piece to make my maisonette feel like home. I will do a, slightly, more in depth post about my maisonette, with some before and after pictures (where possible) at some point. So now, I can finally start 2026 with living in a new home, and not living out of one room, being too scared to leave the bedroom, once it got dark.
          Work has been both good and bad, at times, too. The office manager left in July, to the relief of all of us. He was a narcissist and just a very difficult person to get along with or even have a simple conversation with. I have started to learn a lot more at my role and can now do the production manager’s job… well, most of it. I haven’t done any of the audits yet, but I can do the production planning for the factory for the month. I have done this twice now and everything went smoothly. I have convinced HR to let me do ergonomic assessments on the shop floor staff, which uses some of my previous training/skills, and I am working with the engineering team, to try to help find ways to make some of the repetitive tasks less painful for those who suffer from arthritis and repetitive strain injuries. I have been in my role for just over a year now. Work has become my safe place. It is my routine, where I know (more or less) what to expect. There are some people that I get along with really well. I call my manager and the goods-in manager my Work Dads. I do hope that this is the job that I am able to stay at for a long time.
          This year was, also, the magical year that I met my forever person. He is the most patient, understanding and kind-hearted person that I have ever known. And when I struggle, he doesn’t get angry with me or shout at me or say, “Suit yourself.” He makes me happy when we are together, and apart. He makes me giggle. He makes me feel safe. I can trust him and talk to him in a way that I never could with anyone else. I don’t have to try to hide my autistic struggles and anxieties. I can discuss, with him, things that are hard for me, and we create ways to work around them, or overcome them. He says that I am not, “too much,” unlike other relationships. He understands that things are hard for me, mostly because I have never done them before, or no one ever had the patience to let me try before. I can be myself around him, which makes me feel very happy and comfortable. This year, we have been on so many dates, we have been on a weekend away, taken a day trip and I have met his parents and his sister and her partner. I was even able to walk three miles, to get a train to, by myself, then walk one mile after getting the train, just to see him – and none of that I had even done with him, but I was able to figure it out because of him. These are all really big things for me, but they weren’t scary. Yes, I did find things hard, at times, but I was still able to get through them, with his support, and now I know that some of those things, I can do independently, which I wasn’t able to before.
          We have created so many wonderful memories in the six months that we have known each other. And to accompany the memories are so many photographs of our adventures, whether it has been a cute, little date at our favourite café, a day trip filled with new experiences or just a fun pizza date at mine, we have captured all of our fun moments and we have been creating a scrapbook along the way. This has been so much fun!
          It has been so uplifting and amazing to have a partner who is loving, supportive, who wants his friends and family to know that I exist, even with my struggles. He is proud of me and helps me to see the positive and good in things… and when I can’t, he helps me to find ways around it, so that I can still enjoy the day. I have experienced so many new and wonderful things, with this incredible man. He doesn’t say that I can’t do things, just because I struggle. He lets me try and I get to see that the scary things aren’t always as scary. I got to visit several cafes, stay over in a hotel, go to the theatre, eat out at a restaurant, go to the cinema, meet his parents… these are all things that no one has had the time of day to help me do before.
          I am so grateful for him. I appreciate every single moment that we are together. I am so very proud of him and all of his achievements that we have celebrated together, with new work contracts and promotions. He works incredibly hard and is very ambitious. Having struggled for many years in retail, deciding to better himself, take on a few office jobs, to taking a huge risk in taking a small apprentice role, and this year passing the apprenticeship and being promoted twice… this man is so hard working. I am so incredibly proud of him. I cannot wait to see what life has in store for him, as I know he will handle it well, as he has a great supportive system in his family and friends, and I will always be there for him, offering support in any way that I can.
          He has, also, reignited my love for musical theatre. I have discovered so many musicals, with my biggest obsession being the Beetlejuice musical and Something Rotten. I have played the ‘Something Rotten’ soundtrack so many times that I think I know most of the songs off by heart – especially William Shakespeare’s parts. How comforting it is to have a partner who is comfortable knowing that if I transitioned to a male, I would want to be a camp William Shakespeare, and he is completely fine with that!
          Oh, and how can I forget, we spent Christmas together! No one has ever wanted to spend time with me over Christmas before. I once had a partner say to me that they were glad they had turned their phone off on Christmas Day, because I had sent them a text message asking them how their day was going, and I gave them an update about my day. We opened presents together, watched Christmas films, while cuddled up on my settee, and we had Christmas dinner together, which I made for us. There was no hosting for people or visiting people. It was just the two of us. We have a very special ornament for our Christmas tree too:

And here is a picture of us enjoying our Christmas dinner:

          Oh, and he bought me Christmas presents that are me! He, and his family, all bought me things that I like. Not generic gifts, from the Christmas gift section, in a supermarket. He and his sister were even in competition, to see who could buy me the best Christmas present.

         Living on my own has helped my mental health a lot. I no longer have the torture of the teenager, living next door to me, who scratches her nails down the walls, cackles like a witch, has her boyfriend over at the age of fourteen, hasn’t had a bedtime since she was eleven years old, squeals down the phone at all hours, places a device against the joining wall that vibrates every ten seconds throughout the night. Most of the time, I have silence. This is why I really wanted to keep hold of this maisonette, despite all of the bad things happening. My only worry is when the new neighbours move in, across the hallway, as that entire property needs completely gutting (I know, because I looked at that one first, before my one went up for sale). At least their walls are not connected to mine, but the echo in the hallway is super loud. The dog barking, in the house behind often sounds like it is coming from inside the maisonette block, but I know that it isn’t. My double glazing is fairly good and the schizophrenic guy, who lives downstairs, is mostly quiet, apart from Sunday nights where he slams his hands on a keyboard, at full volume, like he is a two-year-old wanting to play the piano. Wearing noise cancelling earphones and then noise cancelling headphones over the top of that, while listening to a sleep meditation does help most of the time.
          I have also been experimenting with makeup this year! This is a big thing for me, because I hate being able to feel things touching my face. I found an autistic mother’s YouTube channel, where she shared some of the products that she can tolerate and how to apply them. I have been feeling a little more confident, in myself, and less like an old lady – not that my partner thinks that, but sometimes it is nice to feel nice.
          I already have so many things to look forward to in 2026. For a start, at the end of January, my partner and I are going to Stratford-upon-Avon again. Last time we went, he bought some books from the Shakespeare bookshop, but this time, I already know that there are a couple of plays that I haven’t read that I am really looking forward to. Then, in April, we are looking to go to Paris, which I am super excited about. I have always wanted to go to Paris. He knows how important it is, for me, to always have something to look forward to, even if it is just something simple, like a hot chocolate date at a café or a cereal date at mine. We do love our cereal dates. We even bought each other a cereal bowl for our special cereal dates, and we both picked something super special that we know means something to us. He really is perfect, and I cannot wait to see what magical adventures we share in 2026.
          I wanted to end this with a photo from a sweet, little hot chocolate date, from the other day. 

 

- Josie -

Flag Rant

Why are people so proud to be racist, scary, horrible people? Why do people think they are being clever, when they entice fear in others? I live alone, but lucky for me, no one on my road is racist, homophobic, transphobic or anything a-phobic. Or if they are, they keep their opinions to themselves and do not threaten the rest of the community or demand that everyone else must follow their beliefs, like some crazed cult leader. My problem is that, although, I live in a nice area, I am on the next road over from the boarder of the Birmingham catchment area. The first two roads that I have to walk down, after I leave my road, on my way to work, every day, are lined with Union Jacks and St George’s Crosses. I guess, the numbskulls who hung the flags, at the very least, hung the Union Jacks the correct way up. I have heard from a few colleagues that, where they live, the idiots responsible for the flags hung them all upside down. Well, I guess they are in distress, because their masculinity feels threatened, so maybe we should give them the benefit of the doubt.

Walking down those two roads, before 6am, five days a week, and after 5pm every evening, really do not make me feel safe at all. I carry a personal alarm with me, but still, knowing that the area is so racist, and thug-like, really makes me feel uncomfortable. I have a five mile walk to and from work as it is, and the only way to avoid these two roads, would be to walk in the opposite direction, which would make my walk to work almost seven miles, which, to me, just feels very stupid to decide to opt for a walk to work that takes an extra two mile walk, but I am wondering whether I should start walking that way. Nowhere else on my walk has any flags. It is just the first two roads that start the Birmingham area off, from where I live.

Now, this complaint is coming from a white, British female. I feel threatened and I fit the racists’ Nazi-like ideologies. Did no one learn anything from Hitler’s World War II? Nobody? I know a lot of the racists flying these flags don’t have a secondary school education, but, scarily, some of them do. I don’t even think that the majority of these racist, flag bearers have a single piece of human decency. Take the guy who is head of the anti-Islam campaign and one of the UK's most prominent far-right activists. He goes by the name Tommy Robinson, probably because he believes it sounds more racist than his actual name. The merchandise that he is selling is made by the people that he is being racist against. This makes me so very angry! How is this man able to get away with the things that he does and says? I know that he has had court appearances, but he is essentially the new Hitler and must be stopped before he causes a civil war, in the UK.

I have said several times that I would really like to take down the Union Jacks and St George’s Crosses and replace them all with the LGBTQ flag. To me, that flag represents safety, peace and belonging. That community is full of very friendly, respectful and supportive people. It is my community. I bet all of the racist people would feel threatened then, because racist people, also seem to be homophobic too and transphobic. I honestly have no idea why. The LGBTQ+ community are not a cult, trying to convert every straight person into being gay. We are not choosing to be different. Nor is this a new trend. There have always been gay, bisexual, asexual, demisexual etc. people. It is just taken until now, for us to be allowed to not feel terrified to exist, or that there is something wrong with us. My mum’s dad was a drag queen in the 70s, and they had to hide it, in fear that they would lose their job. People shouldn’t have to live in fear of who they are or who they have feelings for, and who they don’t have feels for. The LGBTQ+ community is not out there, forcing people to not be straight, they are there to support people who aren’t sure, or who know they aren’t straight and need some support, as their family or friends might not understand. They are there as friends and allies for those who share the same feelings and ideologies. Why can’t I take down the flags that only stand for racism and that were put up specifically to spread fear by thugs, and replace them with a flag that represents a community full of so many positive messages. The world has come so far, especially since the internet, which has helped the LGBTQ+ community grow strong and be understood. We are able to reach so many positive communities, make friends with people and share happiness, peace and friendship. Isn’t that the message that the UK should be spreading? We aren’t racist thugs, who want to kill anyone who doesn’t have ten generations, plus, of British heritage. What kind of lesson does this teach future generations?

I am pleased to see that the local council painted over the red cross that was made on the white roundabout, near me, but I dare say that my local council painted over this, and not Birmingham, who are the ones to blame for the flags, near me anyway. At least that is progress. Solihull, also, held their very first pride parade this year, and although I was really sad that I was unable to go, because I was unwell, it is so exciting to see all of the photos from the event, and how it brought so many people together.

My partner said something that I find very interesting, as it was not something I have thought about before. He said that as people get older, there is a higher probability that they become less inclusive of others/more close-minded, and this age-change of viewpoints can happen from as early as their thirties. This has got me a little worried about possibly losing the few friends that I do have, as we are all in our mid-to-late thirties/early forties, so what if one of them suddenly decides to become a completely different person overnight. It also helped me to come to terms with a person, from my past, who severely changed their political viewpoints over the last ten years, from neutral with slight left-wing tendencies, to far right political beliefs. I had, always, thought that he was influenced by his sunflower, but maybe his age led him astray. It’s always heartbreaking to see someone you once cared so much for, turn into the type of person that you hate.

I really do hope that Birmingham council see sense, stop the racists, and take the flags down soon, so it feels safe to walk to work again, and just go for a walk in general.

 

- Josie -

 

My Weekend In Stratford-upon-Avon

Stratford-upon-Avon is one of my favourite places. It never occurred to me, until last year, how fortunate I am. I practically lived there for three years, when I was at college, and I can travel there, pretty much, whenever I want to. Last year, I was in the Shakespeare bookshop, and I was in the queue behind two teenage girls, with American accents. The one girl said to the other, “My teacher came here last year and cried.”

It was wonderful, to spend a weekend, in my favourite place, with my favourite person. Not only was that in itself something special, but it was my first time spending a weekend away with someone!

It was absolute, positively wonderful! We got to do so many wonderful things, that I never would have been able to do, if I was on my own. Quite a few things that we did, I had never done before too.

When we got up, we went for a walk along the river side. We fed some of the swans, and a few mallard ducks. I got a few photos, but they weren’t very good ones.

 

Then, we walked towards the bandstand and sat and watched the park runners, do three laps. That took us up to 10am, which was when the Butterfly Farm opened. I was really, really looking forward to being there. I could have easily stayed inside for hours. The butterflies were so mesmerising. It filled me with such a sense of peace. Sadly, I didn’t get the opportunity to take any pictures (there were a lot of young children, so it was very difficult). I would love to be able to go back, one day, and spend even longer there, and take pictures too. The butterflies inspired me. When we got back home, I bought some watercolour paper, as I want to attempt to paint some of them, especially the Blue Morpho Peleides (that’s my favourite). If I didn’t have such a low pain tolerance, I would get a butterfly tattoo.

 

 

During the kids’ summer holidays, Stratford-upon-Avon had up the Ferris wheel that travels around the West Midlands and Warwickshire, during half term. After our butterfly adventure, went for a ride on the Ferris wheel. I didn’t manage to get any photos here, either, because as the Ferris wheel go to the top, my partner decided that he was scared of heights and the Ferris wheel itself. How he didn’t know that he was scared of heights before is beyond me. He really was a silly billy. To cheer him up, I took him to the Shakespeare bookshop, where he bought a copy of Macbeth. Then, we went to the Christmas Shop, where I was good and I didn’t buy anything. I keep having to tell myself that I don’t have any room in my maisonette for any more stuff. It is only just about big enough for me. It scares me to know that I will have to learn to part with things, to make room for another person. Anyways, where was I, oh yes,  I was a little sad, because the bear shop isn’t there anymore.

We had a wonder through a few shops, then we went to a café, where we had a dessert for breakfast. I would never have gone into this café on my own, nor would I have ever enjoyed the food that we had. I had a crepe (which was actually the thickness of a pancake) with strawberries and blueberries and a peppermint tea, while my partner had a bubble waffle (which seemed really fun, as neither of us had ever seen one of these before) with Oreo, marshmallows and Smarties. I thoroughly enjoyed mine. I tasted so good that I have been thinking about it periodically since. It looked so pretty too!

 (I'm not sure why Blogger is flipping a landscape image portrait).

 

 After food, I think we walked around the market, then back down to the riverside. We happened to walk around to Cox’s Yard, and my partner spotted the Wizard of Oz poster, which was the last showing that day. He asked if I wanted to see it. I had already known about it and had wanted to see it. Originally, he had suggested that we go to Stratford-upon-Avon next weekend, but there wasn’t anything on at any of the little theatres that I would have wanted to see, and I knew that he had wanted to see something at the theatre. I secretly hoped that we could go to Stratford-upon-Avon sooner, so that we could see the Wizard of Oz, and here we were… and he was suggesting that we go to see it. So, we bought two tickets, then we went to feed the ducks again, before the show started. The weather started to look as though it was going to rain, so we went into a café, where we stayed until the Wizard of Oz show.

The Wizard of OZ was unbelievably amazing. I absolutely loved it so much. It made me wish that I had done theatre set design or something. I really wished that I was able to be a part of something as wonderful as that. It was so good, so incredibly good. And the theatre was only three rows. We were so close to the entire show. Oh, I loved it so much. I really wish that I had taken a flyer for it, to keep in our scrapbook, because that show meant so much to me. I had done bits of set design stuff, when I was at school, as my art teacher was on the art department for one of the Alien films, and she had got us to sculpt set designs for our coursework. I keep thinking about how I want to create a papier-mâché toadstool stool or giant cupcake. I want to decorate my entire maisonette as though it was a stage set.

 

 

After the theatre show, it was raining, and we walked around Stratford-upon-Avon town, trying to find somewhere to have dinner. We had to circle around a few times, because everywhere was full, because it was raining (that and it was still the school holidays). We found a pizza place. This is something that I had never noticed before, but my partner pointed it out to me, there were pizza places everywhere! We were wondering if lots of Italians moved to Stratford-upon-Avon, to celebrate Shakespeare, as so many of his plays were set in Italy: Romeo and Juliet, Othello, Julius Xeasar, The Taming of the Shrew, The Merchant of Venice, and there are probably many more. I don’t want to talk about my anxiety surrounding this whole experience, because the less I have to think about it, the better. I will just leave a few photos here.

 

This isn’t quite a Stratford-upon-Avon thing, but while we were in the café that we went to, in Stratford-upon-Avon, the lady on the table next to us had a huge hot chocolate. I had kind of been wanting one ever since. My partner and I went on a date, the day after we got back, and I had a really nice hot chocolate, with cream and marshmallows and it made me so happy.

That is all for now. Until the next adventure…

- Josie -