Worthless

I’m feeling worthless,
What’s the purpose?
Not worth five seconds of your time.
Don’t want to break it,
But I can’t take it.
My serenity’s in decline.
I want it to be,
Why can’t you see,
You’re breaking my heart.

I was used to being worthless,
Never feeling good enough.
It was so draining, so frustrating,
Pretending that I’m tough.
Never thought I’d have to fake,
Feeling fine when I’m with you,
But you’ve got me feeling worthless,
Don’t know what I should do.

I’m feeling worthless,
What’s the purpose?
Not worth five seconds of your time.
Don’t want to break it,
But I can’t take it.
My serenity’s in decline.
I want it to be,
Why can’t you see,
You’re breaking my heart.

I need to get used to feeling worthless
Not worth five seconds of your time.
My only request was good morning,
When you open your eyes.
You made it clear, you won’t spare
Five seconds, I had asked of you.
It’s got me feeling so worthless,
I don’t know what to do.

I’m feeling worthless,
What’s the purpose?
Not worth five seconds of your time.
Don’t want to break it,
But I can’t take it.
My serenity’s in decline.
I want it to be,
Why can’t you see,
You’re breaking my heart.

- Josie -

Mugged, Raped, Escape!

Why do some men not see the danger,
Women face every day?
Danger can be at every turn,
But they always downplay.

My ex-partner would never meet me,
On my walk home through the park.
It can be really scary,
Being female, alone, in the dark.

He never believed…
You might get mugged,
You might get raped,
You might get stabbed by a drunk
And you can’t escape.

You don’t just have to be female,
To be worried about being safe.
I know a man who had his bicycle stolen,
And was given chase.

Now he’s too scared to walk alone,
Home from work through any park.
He’s too scared to ride a bike,
Even when it isn’t dark.

Because he knows…
You might get mugged,
You might get raped,
You might get stabbed by a drunk
And you can’t escape.

There’s a stabbing every week,
In the village where I work.
There’s been a victim on every corner,
In the park is where they lurk.

There’s been many store break-ins,
And weekly reporting’s of women being raped.
The police have said walk in groups
And don’t stay out too late.

We’ve all be warned…
You might get mugged,
You might get raped,
You might get stabbed by a drunk
And you can’t escape.

A few staff, at work, have checked in
And made sure I carry my alarm.
For many years, I always have,
In case I ever come to harm

It really makes me anxious,
When walking through a park.
Why can’t people see the dangers,
Regardless of whether it is dark?

Because…
You might get mugged,
You might get raped,
You might get stabbed by a drunk
And you can’t escape.

I don’t want to get mugged.
I don’t want to be raped.
I fear I’ll be stabbed by a drunk
And I can’t escape.

It happens at least once a week,
Crime at the park and in the streets.
Unless you drive,
It's getting hard to stay alive.

 

- Josie -

Good Morning, I'm Home, Goodnight!

When you wrote you name and phone number
On that scrap of brown paper,
Didn’t know I’d be thinking of it,
Over ten years later.
Yes, it is over,
And I accept it.
But that brown piece of paper,
I wish I had kept it.

It held all those memories,
Of a happier time.
Before we were over,
And the times that I cried.
Yes, I’ve moved on,
I’ve found someone new.
But when things get hard,
I’m left thinking of you.

From that brown, paper note,
We had our first date.
After, you asked for hug,
And it all felt like fate.
You said you’d let me know,
Once you arrived home.
I never had to ask,
You’d text from your phone.

Then, from that day,
Everything changed.
You gave me a routine
And it didn’t feel strange.
I was your first thought,
When you opened your eyes;
You always confirmed this,
With your, “Good morning,” surprise.

Then, when you arrived home,
From work or your friends,
You’d text me, “I’m home,”
And the worrying ends.
I was your last thought every evening,
As you turned off your light,
You never forgot
To text me, “Goodnight.”

For five years you text me,
Those five words every day,
Sent with three kisses,
Never a delay.
Even when we took a break,
Those five words, they remained.
It was our silent bond.
Nothing explained.

When we parted ways,
Each other we replaced.
Our new partners continued,
What, between us, had erased.
Ryan said, “Good morning,
I’m home and goodnight,”
I never asked,
Nor did it cause a fight.

A few years passed with dating,
I met quite a few,
But no one had every
Compared close to you.
Then I met Robert,
A man so kind and wise.
He used those five words,
It was no surprise.

Never with Robert,
Or Ryan or you
Was this ever a problem
Nor felt forced to do.
Only when you grew distant
And our love did fade,
Did you start to change,
The five words you betrayed.

I was no longer your first thought,
When you opened your eyes.
You didn’t text me first,
You’d talk to one of the guys.
At some point in your day,
After an hour or two,
It's like you remembered,
What you ought to do.

Your, “Good mornings,” were late,
And your, “I’m home,” too.
You’d speak to anyone else,
While I worried about you.
Then one the evenings
You forgot your, “Goodnight,”
I’d cry myself to sleep,
Couldn’t turn off the light.

I’ve with someone new,
And everything’s fine,
But what was once my normal,
Feels like just yours and mine.
I’ve tried hard to tell him,
Without those five words I ache,
But it feels like being honest,
Was a big mistake.

I don’t want to lose him,
I don’t want it to be through,
But lately every day
Reminds me of losing you.
I’m crying, I’m scared,
I don’t know what to do.
Those five words were so simple
When it was me and you.

 

- Josie -